I actually rather enjoyed that track. Definitely not what i had expected. That being said I can tell that you understand you're music theory and you understand composition well. I was thoroughly impressed where you took the track from beginning to end. While i may not really be able to provide proper feedback, due to never hearing something like this before, i can say that i really enjoyed it. Ambient noise is hard to work with. Great use of panning as well. a little constructive feedback i can give though thats not related to composition is make sure you eq that feedback noise you used from around 1:30 to 2:10 reaaaallllyyy well, or just get rid of it. That kind of noise can create a nasty headache. Again though, Great piece of music.

I love what im hearing here. Clearly there's a lot of emotion in the song. Emotion in a track is what separates good music from great music. a little advice i could throw at you would be to kind of chill with your delay on your main lead sound. It's a really nice sound, but to much delay can make it have a kind of jarring effect. The kids playing is a great effect. that transition at 3:45 is great as well. i noticed that you really put a muffle on that bass before that transition almost making it impossible to hear without good speakers. I would say that if you were to gradually cut whatever you did to muffle that kick so it builds up and then have it slam like it does right at the transition point, it could sound real nice. The piano is great btw. Your mix down is about perfect. Great track John.